WHAT does Personal Development really mean?
On Wikipedia Personal development is defined as activities that improve: awareness and identity, develop talents and potential, build human capital and facilitate employability, enhance the quality of life, and the realization of dreams and aspirations. Personal development can take place over the course of a person’s entire life.
Personal Development should be something we are all constantly working on. Nowadays we are becoming more and more aware of what it really is and the benefits it brings to all aspects of our lives.
Personal development is the life process that takes you on a journey to your highest self. The focus is on the progress you do in time, not necessarily on the end result as there is always room for improvement.
Development, GROWTH is not always an ascending line. It has its ups and downs and its stagnation periods…Just like the life pulse on an electrocardiogram monitor. You don’t want a straight line here 🙃. Just remember that all these are part of the process and be kind to yourself when you don’t see results every single day. Just trust the process and remember that growth is not always visible. You chose the seed you want to plant, researched what it needs to grow, you planted it, you watered and cared for it according to the instructions. Will you see the sprout (result) immediately? No. The growth is happening under the soil, not visible yet to the eye. But you continue caring for it as you trust the process. And once you see the sprout you still continue taking care of it according to new needs. And after a while, you will be blessed with the beauty of its leaves, flowers, fruit and again seeds.
It is exactly the same thing when we want to plant and cultivate some aspects of our life. We become aware of what is missing in our life or what needs to be improved or even removed to make space for good things to come in. We decide what we want to focus on, we research what we need to learn and do. We analyze if we can do it alone or we might need the help of our friends, family, colleagues, coach, mentor, psychologist, etc. We plan and prioritize. And we start behaving according to what the process implies in order to get the results we want.
Personal development stages and HOW to implement them in our lives.
1. Self -Knowledge / Self Awareness
In a century when Artificial Intelligence is more and more used by Companies to get to know you and to manipulate you, you’d rather get to know yourself first.
Spend some time with yourself, observe yourself, (your thoughts, your behavior, your feelings, your fears..).
Analyze your strengths, your weaknesses, gain clarity on your needs, and wants, identify opportunities to grow, Evaluate your resources. Decide what you are going to start with.
Learn things about yourself, use them to start growing yourself, to become better and better, healthier, smarter, more skillful, more balanced, and more self-confident.
Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.
― C.G. Jung
2. Environment Awareness
We are social beings, we are wired for connection. Once we got clear on who we are, what we are good at, what we need to work on, we have to go outside and interact with different people (family members, colleagues, friends, people in our community, people we know more or less…) and places (home, neighborhood, working place,..)
To be able to take the best from these relationships/interactions (and give our best to them) we need to evaluate the way these interactions make us feel.
Do I feel that I am giving too much?
Do I feel that I am giving too little?
Are there any boundaries I need to work on? Remove or set?
Is there anybody I could get help/advice/guidance/support from?
Is there anybody I could offer my help/advice/guidance/support to?
Is there any information that could help me develop in the area I want to?
Is there any book/course/workshop/blog/video/tutorial to offer me the information I need to grow myself in the area I have identified I need to?
Does my home/ my working space provide me the ambiance I need?
Is there anything I need/want to change/add/remove?
Try to align your real self, your strengths, your needs, and wants to the people, places, and resources around you.
You are a product of your environment. So choose the environment that will best develop you toward your objective. Analyze your life in terms of its environment. Are the things around you helping you toward success – or are they holding you back?
W. Clement Stone.
3. Planing
You have identified your needs, your wants, your resources, and your opportunities. You know now what you need to work on, what you want to improve. It’s time to design a plan for your development process, to set short– and long-term goals, to think:
What do I want to get better at?
Do I want to learn a new skill/a new language/increase my area of expertise?
Do I want a fitter and healthier body? Do I want better parenting skills/teaching skills?
What are the actions I need to take in order to achieve my goal?
What is in my power to control? (we can always control what we give our time, focus, and energy to)
What do I need help with?
Where can I get help from? Family? Friends? Mentors? A Specialist?
When am I going to do what it takes to develop? Where? How often?
Where am I going to do it? (at home/at work/at gym/at the library/at a specialized institution etc …)
How am I going to keep myself accountable? Do I join a community? Do I track my progress? Do I hire a Mentor/Specialist to help me stay committed and on track? Do I do all of these?
What is my yardstick going to be? How do I measure my progress? Do I compare myself to others? Do I compare myself with my own self, what I achieved yesterday/last week/last month versus what I achieved today/this week/this month?
Remember – Planning is a vital stage of progress.
Failing to plan is planning to fail.
Source unclear – Alan Lakein or Benjamin Franklin
4. Following Up
You start implementing new practices according to the personal development plan you designed.
You celebrate the small victories (I recommend a moment of internal gratitude when a milestone is reached or when you achieve some results-intrinsic motivation boosted)
Inevitably you will experience failure too. This is your opportunity to work on your patience and to practice resilience. To build your GRIT skills. To recover fast, roll-up your sleeves and continue from where you are. To learn the lesson, to adapt and to try again, and again till you do it. You don’t give up on what you really want. You just change/adapt the way you get it (if needed).
Remember that FAIL = First Attempt In Learning.
If today you couldn’t show up or register progress just remember that this is also part of the process. It’s an opportunity to learn more and do better tomorrow.
It’s just by stepping out of your comfort zone, by overcoming your fears, and being consistent that you can reach your full potential. And it’s just by reaching our full potential that we experience life fulfillment.
Success comes from taking the initiative and FOLLOWING UP…Persisting… eloquently expressing the depth of your love. What simple action could you take today to produce a new momentum toward success in your life?
Tony Robins
5. Self-Growth
If you stick enough with the process, you will notice that some of the tasks become automatizations. It will come easier and more natural for you to do things that seemed very difficult or even impossible before. You experience the inner satisfaction of your results. You will witness the positive impact your newly built skill has on you and on people around you. This is the time to keep going. To go to the next level of development, to start building on a new skill or to take the one you have already built to a new level.
Personal development is a lifelong process. You get better and better at something as long as you keep going, keep learning, trying, and doing. As you came to implement some healthy habits (read, meditate, practice journaling, exercise…) and master some skills and tools (planning, following up, prioritizing, being patient, resilient, committed, etc) that you needed in order to achieve your goals you have now a strong system to help you achieve new goals.
While growing ourselves we can help and inspire others. And as you become better, a better human being, a better professional – your help and services become more efficient.
WHY Personal Development?
There are lots of benefits that Personal Development brings to our lives. Some of the biggest reasons you should start focusing on your personal development are:
1. Clarity
Once you spent the time to know who you really are, what you want, what you need, what are your strengths, and what you need to work on, you will inevitably take action towards getting what you want, toward becoming your best self. You will start the personal development journey.
2. Self-Confidence
On your personal development journey, you will come to master some practices and some tools that have proved to help you achieve what you wanted. Even if you might not have achieved it yet you have learned more, gained more clarity. You will come to trust the process and your ability to stick with it till you reach your target. You feel better overall and you are better equipped to continue your growth journey.
3. Better relationships
First of all, you will notice a better relationship with yourself. As you know who you truly are and what you want, you take the necessary action to provide it for yourself. You stopped now beating yourself up when experiencing failure, you are kinder and more supportive of your needs. As you learned how to embrace your true self, how to love yourself, how to prevent yourself from criticizing who you are, now you can transfer these skills to loving, caring for, and accepting others. Naturally, you will experience better relationships with your family, your friends, your community…You will understand more and judge less. You will be kinder, more considerate, and responsive to other people’s needs. (more on Better relationships HERE)
4. Constant improvement
Once you see that you can actually do what seemed very difficult or even impossible before, that you can achieve the goals you set, you will set even higher targets and you will constantly increase your comfort zone by bringing your strengths to the excellence level and by strengthening your weaknesses. By constantly becoming a better version of yourself.
5. More joy and fulfillment
As you practice personal development activities you will see the positive outcomes spreading in more areas of your life. Everything you do in one field of your life is in a tight connection to other fields. If you managed to have a balanced diet and to exercise you will notice that you feel more positive and energetic, that you can focus better on your projects, and that you are more productive. And this is just one random example of the plenty benefits personal development practices have in your life.
Once you got clarity and set yourself on course, you start seeing the results of your hard work and commitment your intrinsic motivation and self-esteem increase. With clarity, the right practices, and commitment your life will become meaningful and you have found the purpose that fills you and keeps you going even in the hardest moments.
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